Knowing Your Values

Values shape who we are and how we live. They also influence where we live. Knowing your values and not sacrificing them to please others is key to becoming more confident in yourself. It also helps you determine who is right for you and your life. It’s good to sit down and think about what your values really are if you haven’t done so before – write them down if it’s helpful. (For example, some people value having a family and putting their energy into raising their littles. Others value self-discovery, learning, and creating. You’ll notice how differently these two types of people will live as they go through life – and their values may adjust depending on what stage they are in, too.) Don’t let other people guilt trip you for your values – they are what make you unique.

Understand What Makes You Unique

Your values, interests, personality, living preferences, lifestyle, career choice will determine how you live and how you present yourself to the world. Everyone’s unique in their own way. If we were all carbon copies, life would be boring and eventually someone would start to question what gives (If society were actually like this, it would be because we were all being fed the same pills haha). Owning who you are is so key to feeling fulfilled. It’ll arm you when others criticize you for being different (Maybe they think you’re too quiet or too loud or too immature). It also will help you figure out the type of people *you* want to be around. Your tribe exists.

Honing In On Your Strengths

Everyone has strengths. It’s a good idea to know them well. Strengths give us confidence and help us go through life. They can get you a certain career or make you fun at parties. Especially if you’re going through a hard time, knowing what gets you through the tough stuff is very helpful.

Recognizing Your Weaknesses

We’ve all got weaknesses, too. It’s a fact of life. Knowing what yours are and coming to peace with it can be so helpful. Denial will set you back and hinder your personal growth. Some weaknesses can be strengthened and by all means do what you can to turn weaknesses into strengths where possible. At the end of the day, no one’s perfect and it’s okay to not be able to do certain things well or to do things a little differently from other people.

Not Comparing Yourself To Others

This is probably the *most* important thing not to only for happiness but for good mental health. I’ve seen some people live in misery for years because they always compare themselves to others. Seeing others do well in certain areas sets them off or they always look at where they are compared to others their age. Just know that there’s no wrong way to be – you don’t have to reach a certain income or lifestyle by a certain age – much of what you see on social media isn’t reality anyway. In some cases, someone had a terrible day then decided to take a selfie or a picture of a lovely setting to boost their mood a little – what looks like “showing off” might not be that at all. Some people project things on others’ posts that weren’t even intentional. Comparison can lead to envy and jealousy – two ugly things that can deter your happiness and set you back from a fulfilling life. I think when you realize that we’re all just human with our own struggles with our own idea of what happiness is, you’ll stop judging others for who they are and look inward to who you really are. Water your own grass to keep it green. You’ll be so much happier that way. ❤

Setting Boundaries

This is so key to maintaining good mental health and keeping your independence. Self-fulfillment means ensuring your emotional and physical needs are met in relationships. Healthy boundaries keep both parties accountable for their actions so that the relationship can continue to thrive. You may have people in your life who are critical, judgmental, or downright mean – you’ll have to determine what their relationship is to you and whether you’ll want to cut them out entirely or limit your contact with them. It’s amazing what misery’s effect can be on the most optimistic, thriving person – it spreads like wildfire and takes everyone down with it. You deserve happiness and you don’t need to apologize for the things you like to do – so set boundaries when needed to ensure others’ negativity doesn’t hinder your beautiful life.

Do More Of What Makes You Happy

There’s been a saying going around and it’s so true. “If you’re feeling burnt out, it’s mostly because you aren’t doing enough of the things that make you feel alive.” It’s important to do things that make you feel fulfilled and happy to be alive. Schedule them in if you need to – but don’t let yourself go through life not doing things that make you happy. If your job makes you miserable, there’s always another one (Just don’t quit until you have another one lined up). If you hate where you live, move (Yes, it is that easy. I’ve done it before. If there are serious barriers or you need help leaving a place, you should consider speaking with a therapist or social worker.) If you love nature walks, go on one at least once per week. If you’re creative, make time to create – even if you have to tell your family/roommates that you need two hours to yourself everyday. If you haven’t been out in a while, go do something you really enjoy. You’ve got one life and it’s your responsibility to take care of yourself. Most of the time others will not know how to help you unless you tell them what you need. The bonus of taking care of yourself is that it will inspire others in your life to do the same. ❤

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I hope you enjoyed my article today and found it helpful. ❤ May you have a wonderful day – and remember to do something that makes you happy.